Resolutions

i don't normally make resolutions because i never, ever keep them, but since my life has changed so much in the last 2 months, i figure i should try to stick to something.

here are some things i want to do over the next year. they aren't in any particular order.

i want to make our new apartment in minneapolis beautiful. i don't want it to just be a place where we sleep at the end of the work day. i want it to be like home; a place where i'd want to hang out with friends and family. since we both don't want to move again for a long time (yeah, i know...i said that when we moved in here) i want our apartment to be special and homey and have curtains on the windows and rugs on the floors. i want people to feel comfortable there. god knows it's not comfortable where we are now.

i want to cook more and eat out less. not only to save money and time, but to develop my cooking skills. there will be a gas stove in the apartment, which makes my knees weak! i haven't cooked on a gas stove in about 4 years and i miss it. i'd also like to have dinner parties and have my inlaws over for dinner or holidays. i'd love to take a cooking class or two as well. i might not seem like a domestic woman on the outside, but on the inside, all i really want is to be a housewife. but don't tell anyone!

i'd like to see more live bands, dance in different clubs, check out different museums, go to fairs and festivals, maybe join a book or supper club, and enjoy the outdoors more. i'd love to take part in a craft fair or two, if i can get some crafts together to sell. and i'd like to start sewing again. i have a brand new sewing machine that's still in the box just waiting for me to bust it out.

i'd like to be more independent and do things on my own. i want to meet cool people who are into a variety of different things. i need some girl friends. i want to laugh more and have more fun, no matter where i am or who i'm with. i want to do things i've never done before. i want to enjoy life more. i'm only 30! i think back on the past 30 years and i realize how much i missed out on. i don't want that to happen any more.

i want to find a great job that pays well that i absolutley love. i don't want to stress about a job i hate. it just makes me ill. and on that same topic, i want to try my best to not get sick. because i'm tired of being made to feel guilty when germs invade my body. i will always have IBS and the ulcer, but i can try and make sure the flare ups aren't as bad as they have been. but there's not much i can do about it when i get a cold, since colds can't be cured with medicine.

and lastly, i want to people to appreciate me more and show me the respect i deserve. now, i know that i can't make them, but god help me if i put up with it. there is a weak woman in my past who let people step all over her. over the past three years i've tried my best to stop that behavior, and i resolve to not let people take advantage of me, talk down to me, disrespect me, or treat me badly. because refuse to put up with that crap.

that's all i've got for now. i'd really like to follow these the best i can. they all seem like easy things to follow, but sometimes life (and by life i mean work) gets in the way and i forget about what's out there. i can't let life slip by. for all i know, it could be over tomorrow.